Living the Life of a PSLE Parent

As the PSLE comes to a close this week, we share a very  practical read for all parents of school-going children.

Examination time is stressful not just for students, but for parents too.

Just last weekend, I found my son sitting quietly at his table with a frown on his face. While speaking to him, I discovered that the looming PSLE (Primary School Leaving Examination) was the reason for his distress. He was worried that there would be insufficient time to finish all he needed to do.

Indeed, he is just one of the many students all over Singapore gearing up in preparation for their year-end examinations, and it is common to hear about the stress they grapple with during this season. However, something not usually discussed is the fact that ordinary parents, like my spouse and I, are feeling the heat too. How can parents handle the stress effectively, so that they can equip their children to do likewise?


Keeping our emotions in check

First and foremost, here are some questions you can think about. Ask yourself, have I set conditions when it comes to loving my children? Does “Get these results or do this my way and then I will love you?” sound familiar? Such messages always undermine motivation. We may not say it outright, but do we subconsciously send such messages through our tone of voice or non-verbal signals?

Also, do we look to our children for “completion”, or do we try to live out our dreams through them? Such attitudes can put unnecessary pressure on us and more importantly, result in unfair expectations of our children.

Ultimately, children need to know they are loved with a non-judgmental love – we love them not because they are performing, but we love them in spite of anything and everything they may or may not do. I explained to my son that it is important he tries his best, but his worth will never be determined by how well he does for his examinations. He needed to know I would still love and support him, regardless of his results.


Breaking free from stress

Helping our children do their best academically does not necessarily entail harsh discipline and constant nagging. Learning and studying can be made fun too. In fact, fun is serious business for a happy family. Parents can, and should, create a positive atmosphere even during examination time. Going for a walk with our kids, playing a game of Happy Family, and even crazy ideas like camping in the living room can help them de-stress and relax. When our children are happy, they are more likely to be better learners, and you should enjoy an easier time teaching them.

Undoubtedly, stress will rear its ugly head at times, and the key is helping our children handle it well. It is important to remember that our job as parents is to help them deal with these stresses and emotions effectively rather than shelter them or dismiss these realities. We should keep a look out for symptoms of stress like headaches, stomachaches, depression and loss of appetite. Recognize that negative emotions can be opportunities for intimacy and teaching, where we can encourage open and candid conversation and let them feel understood.

As parents, we naturally want the best for our children. Equipping our children to do well in their examinations is important, but so is helping them become happy and effective learners not just in the school setting, but in life.

© 2015  Focus on the Family Singapore Ltd. All rights reserved. Used by permission.
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WHAT'S ON IN COOS

Events on August 24, 2019

9:00 am: Korean Style Bouquet Workshop

Annyeong! Come join us for a fun DIY Korean-styled Bouquet Workshop. We will be using fresh flowers to create a korean-style wrapped bouquet. All materials and tools will be provided.

It cost $80 per participant, or $150 for 2 pax if you are bringing a friend.
As sharp tools will be used, the workshop is suitable for participants 12 years and older.

Dates: 24 & 25 August 2019
Time: 9am to 11.30am (24 Aug), Room 302
1.30pm to 4.00pm (25 Aug), Room 201
Location: Room 302
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9:30 am: An Overview of the OT (Session 2 of 4)

An Overview of the Old Testament
For more information, visit https://www.coos.org.sg/church-life/christian-education/
Location: Room 217
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2:30 pm: English Service : Pastor Mark Tho speaking

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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4:00 pm: COOSkidz Birthday Party - Robot

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4:30 pm: Youth Service : Guest speaker Max Jeganathan

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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5:00 pm: Waggy Walk with Your Furkids!'

Calling out to all COOS members who own a pet dog/s to join us in this gathering to walk our dogs which will take place on the 4th Saturday of each month. Invite your friends and neighbors so that we can also promote bonding which each other! Meeting point and ending point at COOS Plaza. We will be walking along the Alexander Canal for our first walk on 24/8/19. Register through this link and QR code.
Location: Meeting point and end point in COOS Plaza
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Events on August 25, 2019

8:30 am: English Service : Pastor Mark Tho speaking

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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10:45 am: English Service : Pastor Mark Tho speaking

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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Events on August 29, 2019

7:30 pm: Choir Performance

Location: Church of Our Saviour, 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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Events on August 31, 2019

9:30 am: An Overview of the OT (Session 3 of 4)

An Overview of the Old Testament
For more information, visit https://www.coos.org.sg/church-life/christian-education/
Location: Room 217
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2:30 pm: English Service : Pastor Joseph You speaking [Holy Communion]

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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3:00 pm: Flea Market

Volunteers needed for outreach initiatives to our community for the Flea Market! Gather your family, church friends or cell members, go into our neighborhoods (Stirling, Dawson and Mei Ling) at your own time and invite the residents for the flea market event on 31/8 and 1/9. Every flyer has a $10 value coupon attached so that they can exchange for the items at the flea market! Contact Tan Choong Meng at 81235996 for any enquiry.
Location: Atrium
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3:00 pm: Flea Market

Looking for volunteers to set up booths to run a flea market in COOS! Gather a few friends or cell members, collect unused clothes and accessories, mend a stall at the atrium. Proceed of the sales will go towards the Geylang Ministry in COOS! If you are interested, please register at the admin counter or at this google link. Contact Tan Choon Meng at 81235996 for more information.
Location: Atrium
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4:00 pm: Alpha Parenting Teenagers Course

A course for parents with children from 11 - 18 years old. It equips carers of children with strategies and tools in building a healthy family life. It is relevant for people of all faith.

Date: 31 Aug, 7, 14, 21, 28 Sep, 5 Oct
Time: 4pm - 6pm
Venue: COOS

Register at admin desk or scan QR code or thru this link: https://bit.ly/2vq7ClL
Location: COOS
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4:45 pm: Evergreen Fellowship Talk

Evergreen Fellowship is organising a talk by Mr Benny Ong on "Understanding the difference between Advance Medical Directive (AMD), The lasting power of Attorney and The will.
Location: COOS AUDITORIUM
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Events on September 1, 2019

8:30 am: English Service : Pastor Joseph You speaking [Holy Communion]

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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10:45 am: English Service : Pastor Joseph You speaking [Holy Communion]

Location: 130 Margaret Dr, Singapore 149300
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SERVICE DETAILS

MAIN SERVICES (ENGLISH)
Saturday | 2.30pm
Sunday | 8.30am and 10.45am
YOUTH SERVICE (ENGLISH)
Saturday | 4.30pm
*Except every 1st weekend of the month, where youth joins main services.
SERVICES & OFFICE LOCATION
130 Margaret Drive Singapore 149300
It is a 10-minute walk from the Queenstown MRT Station.The bus-stops nearest to the church are served by
SBS Bus 51, 111, 145, 186, 195 and 32 and TIBS Bus 970.

The office is open from Tuesdays to Saturdays, 9am to 5.30pm.

Click here for more service details.